Lubes, Creams, and Other Fun Things!
Trying new things doesn’t have to be intimidating or stressful. It’s all about being comfortable with yourself and your partner! You have to be willing to experiment and see what you like and be willing to give it a chance. Do you might miss out on something you love? Of course you don’t!
Communication
When it comes to sex, my biggest expert advice (haha, I’m not really an expert in much, but it sounds good!) is to really be willing to communicate with your partner. If you’re exchanging body fluids, likely they want you to enjoy the experience as much as they do. They WANT to know that what they’re doing is getting you excited. My other half might legitimately get more turned on by seeing me having an explosive orgasm than he does having one himself. He loves it when he can tell I’m really turned on. When he is using toys with me, he likes knowing what he’s doing with it makes me wet and unable to focus on anything but what he’s doing.
Pretending to like something you don’t like leaves them not trusting you when they find out the truth. Oh, and it leaves you without an orgasm! That’s sort of the point of sex, isn’t it?
Mind-Reading is NOT a Thing!
Mind-reading is not actually a thing. As much as we’d like them to be at times, people aren’t mind readers! If you don’t let your partner know what you’re enjoying, they’ll be wondering if they are doing something wrong or not. Imagine giving a blow job, all the while the guy is laying there, soundless and not moving. Are you going to think you’re turning him on, or wonder if he’s bored? Mhmmm. I’m not a talker during sex (except to “harder” lol, but we do talk about it a little after a here and there. Grabbing his hand, pulling his mouth to where I want, or tensing up until I get a cramp communicates if I’m enjoying what’s going on. Whatever way you want, just do it.
There Are So Many Options!
Anyhow, pretty sure I’ve mentioned before that I have a LOT of sex toys. By a lot, I mean I have an ammo box I made compartments in to fit about half of my toys. That doesn’t include my collection of corsets, BDSM stuff, or the larger toys haha. One of these days, I’m going to need an entire room for storage. I’ve already gotten to the point that I have to get a label maker and label all the charging plugs. I didn’t get that collection by sticking to one or two toy types. If you don’t like the one you tried, move on until you find the one that makes you see stars!
I Don't Love Every Toy I've Got...
After having said all that, I don’t *love* every toy I’ve got. Some I only play with once in a while. For instance, I got the Impulse Electro-Stimulator a while back. I was very nervous trying it! While I do enjoy some level of aggressive stimulation, the idea of having to explain to the ER doc why I’ve got burns in my vagina is NOT an appealing thought! I was really curious, as well as very hesitant to try it, but what’s the worst that could happen? In the end, I do like it, but only if the vibrator is on, and the electrical stimulation is low. The more turned on I am, the more I can tolerate.
Another toy I was hesitant to get was the flogger. I got it myself with no input from my other half. During sex, especially if I’m in the right mood, I love having my nipples pinched and pulled. Having my hair pulled is iffy, it really just depends. Rough sex? Love it. When it came to a flogger though, I wasn’t sure if I would love it or hate it. It felt soft enough, but then, just trailing it across my ass isn’t quite what I had in mind. I was curious about if it would hurt or if it would turn me on to have a flogger used to whip my ass. Turns out I do indeed love it, and I even mouth off just a little to get him to use it during sex.
Give It A Chance...
I guess my point is, you just don’t know. You might not think of yourself as being into something. Maybe you can’t see yourself wearing nipple clamps and being tied up with a rope. Perhaps you’ll find you get really turned on being restrained to a St. Andrew’s Cross. There’s always the chance you won’t like those things, of course. It’s not for everyone, but everyone does have that thing that just really does it for them. Find it, it’s so worth it!
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